Personal Stories Archives - Page 21 of 35

15 year old incest victim forced into abortion

A woman tells her story in the Post-Abortion Review:

I am a victim of incest; one of the “hard cases” for abortion. I was raped by my father when I was fifteen years old. It was not the first time, nor would it be the last. However, this time, I became pregnant.

One night, I became very sick and my parents took me to the hospital. (I believe now that they knew I was pregnant since they took me to a different hospital than normal.) The emergency room doctor discovered that, along with a very bad case of the flu, I was 19 weeks pregnant.

My father flew into a rage, accusing me of all sorts of things, and demanding I have an abortion. The doctor informed me that I was pregnant and asked me what I wanted. I had seen the “Silent Scream” in high school religion class and knew that abortion was murder. In spite of the pain and guilt I felt, knowing who the father of the baby was, it was far better to have a baby than the alternative – to kill it. I refused to have an abortion.

My father flew into an uncontrollable rage and demanded that I consent to the abortion, or that the doctor do it with or without my permission. The doctor refused because of my wishes. My father demanded that an abortionist be found – regardless of the cost.

Within one hour, this man arrived at the hospital, talked with my parents and decided to do the abortion, without speaking to me. I refused and tried to get off the examining table. He then asked three nurses to hold me while he strapped me to the bed and injected me with a muscle relaxant to keep me from struggling while he prepared to kill my baby. I continued to scream that I didn’t want an abortion. He told me, “Shut up and quit that yelling!” Eventually, I was placed under general anesthesia and my child was brutally killed.

I was told that an abortion would solve my problem, when it was never really the problem in the first place.

I was told, “Your parents know what’s best,” when they obviously were only concerned about their own reputations.

I was told, “You make the right decision,” when I was never given a choice. More importantly, where was my baby’s choice?

I grieve every day for my daughter. I have struggled to forget the abuse and the abortion. I can do neither. All I think of is, “I should have done more, fought more, struggled more for the life of my child.”

My situation may not be common, but I know it’s not unique either. The emotions and problems I’ve had to deal with as a result of my abortion are common. The trauma of the rape and abuse were only intensified by the abortion. The guilt of knowing my baby is dead is something I will have to live with for the rest of my life.

I was violated and betrayed over and over by my father, who God created to love and protect me. I was humiliated, hurt, and yes, violated again by the abortionist.

Why do even pro-lifers talk about making exceptions for abortion in cases of rape and incest as if that is a way to have “compassion” for the mother? Why is this the only “loving” response to the situation? I have talked with pro-lifers who consider my abortion acceptable, under the circumstances. I want to tell people, “If you really want to be compassionate, give this mother the opportunity to choose life for her child. If you really love the mothers who have been victimized, don’t let them be exploited again by someone who will make a profit from their dead child — a memory that will haunt them for the rest of their lives.”

The next time you hear of the “hard cases,” please remind people that every crisis pregnancy is difficult for the mother. If you believe these cases are hard, you’re correct — they are extremely hard for the mother. But if you choose abortion, it’s an impossible situation for the baby. The mom needs love, support and understanding, not the pain of allowing herself to be violated again in order to kill her child. Regardless of the circumstances, regardless of the pain involved, that helpless, innocent child has no voice, no defense, and no chance, unless we offer real love and real compassion to the mother.

My abortion was over five years ago. God is still healing me, but it has been a difficult fight. I hesitated to write to you because, although I’m actively pro-life, very few people know my story. It’s still very difficult to share with people, however, I wanted to encourage you in your uncompromising stand for life.

“He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.” (Psalm 147:3) God bless you.

Originally published in The Post-Abortion Review 2(1) Winter 1993.

Elliot Institute, PO Box 7348, Springfield, IL 62791-7348 and the notice “Additional material is posted at www.afterabortion.org

Religious beliefs expressed in testimonies are not necessarily endorsed by clinicquotes.

Note: Please see AfterAbortion.com for terms of reprinting.

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On converting from pro-choice to pro-life

Abortion activist Kristen Walker Hatten, who converted from pro-choice to pro-life:

“I am pro-life because of information. I was pro-choice because of lack of information.”

Kristen Walker Hatten, “Why I Will Never Go Back to Being Pro-Choice on Abortion,” LifeNews 11/16/12.

You can find a lot of information on this webpage.

Information about abortion’s risks (physical and psychological)

Pictures of aborted babies

Quotes from abortionists

Medical textbooks saying that life begins at conception

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Woman shares story, photo of miscarriage

“I had a miscarriage on Palm Sunday last year. We think he was a boy and named him David Raphael. My only prayer when the doctor told me at 11 weeks that my baby had died a month earlier (at 7 weeks gestation), was that I would have something to bury. The doctor said he would either be too small to find or that his fragile body would be crushed in the miscarriage process and there wouldn’t be anything left. On Palm Sunday afternoon he came out. The entire sac was in tact and there he was still floating in the amniotic water. I took a picture so I wouldn’t forget that moment and how God answered my prayer. I think it would be an amazing photo to show people contemplating abortion. Even though he was only 7 weeks when he died, you can see his little arms and legs forming. My 4 year old was looking through my phone when I wasn’t looking one day and found the picture. He came up to me with it and asked me whose baby it was. Even a child can tell that at 7 weeks, the fetus is a little person.”

At 7 Weeks gestation, that is, 7 weeks since the start of the woman’s last period, the unborn baby is 5 weeks old.So this is really a picture of a baby at 5 weeks.

See more photos of miscarried babies that show the humanity of the unborn

This picture and story was shared by Abby Johnson on Facebook

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Child senses her aborted siblings?

Teresa Tomeo told the following story, relate to her by Dr. Philip Ney, a psychologist:

“Similarly, there are psychological effects on siblings of aborted children. Dr. Philip Ney, a Canadian psychologist, has studied these effects for decades. He tells a story of a woman who came to him for counseling for her six-year-old child who was having nightmares, wetting the bed, and suffering from separation anxiety. Dr. Ney, in his interview with the mother, asked her about any pregnancy losses. She told him about two abortions that she had prior to giving birth to this child. Then in a separate interview with the child, Dr. Ney asked the child to draw a picture of her family. She was an only child, and yet she drew a picture with her mom, dad, brother, sister, and herself. She had a sense of the missing siblings.”

Teresa Tomeo Recall Abortion: Ending the Abortion Industry’s Exploitation of Women (Charlotte, North Carolina: St. Benedict Press, 2013) 65 – 66

This seems far-fetched to me, it’s true that children can be remarkably perceptive, but this borders on paranormal. I can’t help but be skeptical, but I’m including the story here and readers can make their own decision as to what they think of it.

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The abortion killed our love…

One man talks about the abortion his wife had:

“In March 1979, my wife became pregnant. This was not a planned pregnancy. My wife was not using any form of birth control as she got sick from the pills and an IUD was painful for her.

My wife did not want the baby because of her age (33) and the fact she felt she had already raised three children (ages 8 to 15, from her previous marriage) at the time she did not want the pain of childbearing until she was in her late 50s. She was also just starting her career as an accountant.

I stressed to her… I loved her, would share the child raising, and I was beginning to love the baby.

In June 1979, she aborted the baby without my knowledge or consent. She had been both ill and very depressed during the pregnancy, and on the day of the abortion she was in high spirits while I was sad, angry, and cried much that day.…

I found it affected my feelings for her more than I could control…

The marriage ended on December 8, 1979, in divorce. I had loved my wife deeply ‘til that point, but I could not get out of my head that the abortion killed our love.”

Arthur B Shostak, Gary McLouth, Lynn Seng Men and Abortion: Lessons, Losses, and Love (New York, NY: Praeger, 1984) 217

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Man who married postabortion woman talks about their struggles

James McNeill married a woman who had 2 abortions in her past. He says:

“When I would bring up the idea of having children, Kathleen would say things like, “I don’t deserve to be a mother.” It started to dawn on me that unresolved pain, shame, and grief related to her abortions were at the heart of her reluctance to have children. It was difficult to know how to address what was clearly a painful and sensitive wound in a way that would be helpful.

One time I said, “You can’t sweep your abortions under the rug forever.”

She said, “If I didn’t sweep them under the rug, I couldn’t live with myself.” Kathleen had stuffed the pain and hurt deep down inside herself in order to cope, but in doing so she walled off an area of her heart that could’ve otherwise been used to love herself and me. The price of avoiding the issue was taking a terrible toll on Kathleen and our marriage.

As the years passed, she was increasingly unable to completely squelch the emotions that came from her post abortion pain and grief. She would occasionally freak out, scream at the top of her lungs, throw things, and break things. She told me she fantasized about cutting herself, and burning herself. I felt so powerless and confused, and I had no idea how to help her, except to calm and soothe her in the moment. I was unable by myself to help her face her abortions and embrace a future that included having children. No matter the tactics, or entry point to the discussion, we wound up at odds, and back to square one when it was over. It was like banging our heads against a brick wall.

One of the hardest things to live with was the fact that our relationship itself was held up as proof that the abortions had been the right thing to do. Kathleen would say to me, “I can’t imagine my life without you, and if I had had the two children, I wouldn’t have you, so the abortions must have been the right thing to do.” What you say in response to statement like that? To have our love serve as justification for abortions hurt deeply, and I felt powerless to do anything to help her or us.”

As things became more difficult in the marriage, they went on a Marriage Encounter retreat to work on their differences:

“About a year after the Marriage Encounter retreat, Kathleen was experiencing some serious depression she could not explain. Her violent screaming and destructive outbursts were worse than ever. She started seeing a psychiatrist, but visit after visit seemed to go nowhere… It is worth noting that many therapists on both sides of the abortion issue are ill-equipped to treat postabortion women and men. Many psychiatrists – like the rest of society – do not even recognize postabortion trauma or grief. Even counselors who are willing to recognize abortion related symptoms often lack the knowledge and resources to offer practical, effective treatment of this trauma.”

James and Kathleen discovered Rachel’s Vineyard, an organization for postabortion women and men (and, increasingly, others affected by abortion) and Kathleen felt great healing at a retreat for postabortion women.

Kevin Burke, David Wenhoff, Marvin Stockwell Redeeming a Father’s Heart: Men Share Powerful Stories of Abortion Loss and Recovery (Bloomington, IN: AuthorHouse, 2007)

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Sibling mourns the death of her little brother, an abortion victim

“When I was 18 my mother told me about her abortion… I was aghast, and said something cruel to her like, “how could you do something so terrible?” We let it drop and I forgot about it. But I had not really forgotten. I didn’t think about it consciously for years… Suddenly I found myself thinking about my little brother! I became disoriented and lost control of the car for a moment as I burst into tears having lost him. I was astounded by my reaction, but I couldn’t shake the sadness and longing to have known him.”

Torre-Bueno A. Peace after Abortion (San Diego, California: Pimpernel Press, 1997) 70 – 71 from

Elizabeth Ring-Cassidy and Ian Gentles. Women’s Health after Abortion: The Medical and Psychological Evidence Second Edition (Toronto, Canada: The deVeber Institute for Bioethics and Social Research, 2003)

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Women tells story of her miscarriage

A woman named Ariel Levy told of the miscarriage of her 19 week pregnancy in the The New Yorker:

“I felt an unholy storm moved through my body, and after that there is a brief lapse in my recollection; either I blacked out from the pain or I have blotted out the memory. And then there was another person on the floor in front of me, moving his arms and legs, alive. I heard myself say out loud, “this can’t be good.” But it looked good. My baby was as pretty as a seashell.

19 weeks

He was translucent and pink and very, very small, but he was flawless. His lovely lips were opening and closing, opening and closing, swallowing the new world. For a length of time I cannot delineate, I sat there, awestruck, transfixed. Every finger, every toenail, the golden shadow of his eyebrows coming in, the elegance of his shoulders – all of it was miraculous, astonishing. I held him up to my face, his head and shoulders filling my hand, his legs dangling almost to my elbow. I tried to think of something maternal I could do to convey to him that I was, in fact, his mother, and that I had the situation completely under control.”

Sadly, the baby died soon after.

Arial Levy “Thanksgiving in Mongolia” The New Yorker November 18, 2013

Abortions are done at this stage in pregnancy every day in the United States and throughout the world.

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Mother who became pregnant during sexual assault argues that her baby is not merely a “product of rape”

Analyn Megison was raped and conceived a baby. She chose to have her child, and is now a loving mother. And an article in LifeNews.com, she describes her frustration when people call her baby “the rapist child” or emphasize how the conception happened, while denying her child’s basic humanity:

“My basic human rights were violated when I was raped during his violent attack years ago as I plead for my dignity and humanity, but I think that one of the things I am still having to advocate for is the basic human rights of my child, and other innocent children like mine. Not only am I not an object for use by a rapist, but my child is also not to be reduced to a mere product of a violent criminal act simply because of how her conception took place.”

….

One of the first questions I am typically asked after I share with someone that I am raising my child who was conceived when I was raped is, “Does she know yet?” — often accompanied by a look of horror….

[T]he stigma that is associated with the precious child who you love so much needs to be overcome to make this world a better place for equal love and respect for your child, regardless of how he or she was conceived.

I hope that one day the first question I hear is something parents freely share with one another, such as: “What kinds of hobbies does she have?” and I could talk about how she has a great sense of humor and loves to do art projects and to sing. Or even, “Does she like being a big sister?,” and I could say, “Yes, she loves her little brothers very much and they love her lots too!””

Analyn Megison “People Look at Me in Horror When They Learn My Daughter Was Conceived in Rape” LifeNews 8/20/14

Analyn Megison is a co-founder / Board Member of Hope After Rape Conception – www.hopeafterrapeconception.org, and a blogger for Save The 1.

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Interview with an ultrasound technician

“There was a time before ultrasound that we didn’t realize that movement happened before 16 – 17 weeks. But now with ultrasound you can see that little seven week baby moving, just slight movement, and it’s the first movement of life. But by the time that baby is nine weeks, 10 weeks old, it’s utilizing the whole uterine cavity and you’ll see the babies waving in the womb, and flipping and sucking their thumbs, and what happens then, when I can introduce that ultrasound to the woman, even when she’s considering abortion, we have found that over 80 to 90% will choose to carry that baby to term, just from seeing the baby on the ultrasound.”

Shari Richard, Ultrasound technician on “Time for hope” Christian television show, Dr. Freda Crews, Host, taped September 2010

Richard does not offer any studies to back up the 80 – 90% statistic. Available studies vary on how effective ultrasounds are in dissuading women from aborting. However there are many, many anecdotal stories of women who have seen an ultrasound of their baby and changed their minds about the abortion they were planning.

Richard then said:

“You know, I personally suffered the pain and the grief and the complications related to abortion when I was 18 years old, and I had complications, long-term complications, that developed into a molar pregnancy, where my uterus ruptured, turned into cancer, the doctor told me I couldn’t have children. Then I went into ultrasound school and I saw the blobs of tissue that I thought I aborted were babies, now babies I couldn’t have, and when I would do ultrasounds on women, they told me to turn the monitors away from women considering abortion and I said, I can’t do this, because I was lied to, and I was suffering the grief and pain.”

Richard describes how the babies she sees on ultrasound seem to have their own personalities even before birth:

And these ultrasound babies are so cute because now, the window to the womb is open and you can’t deny that this is a little baby that has personality, that’s jumping, that’s moving.”

“You know it’s interesting, because I see more babies in the womb that outside, I know their personalities. I know what they do in that large, warm swimming pool. I can tell when they’re sleeping and when they’re waking up.”

Here is a video of the show where this interview took place:

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