On the website AbortionChangesYou.com, a woman tells her story. She got pregnant from a man who was living with another woman. He claimed his relationship with the woman was over, but when she got pregnant, he refused to move out or to support her:
“I remember being genuinely happy. I was the outgoing, silly girl who was always laughing. I remember smiling from the soul. I had no true sadness in my heart….
I also become extremely ill when I am pregnant with a rare condition called Hyperemesis Gravidarum. This basically means that I am throwing up and nauseous literally 24/7 during the entire nine months of pregnancy … When I started feeling ill I became very scared. I felt my back up against the wall. I was responsible for all of my bills, a 2 year old active toddler and for the maintaining my apartment with zero help. …
I would have panic attacks because I couldn’t stop throwing up but had no choice but to go work 12-14 hour shifts. … I had been throwing up for weeks. My throat was raw. My eyes were swollen from crying. I was extremely dehydrated. My feet hurt from working. My heart broken from not being the mother I knew I was capable of being. My spirit was weak…
I called my mom and cried my heart out. She told me that I need to have an abortion that it was the only way to give myself and my current child a chance. I told her I couldn’t possibly go through with that but she insisted that it was the only way that it was just a clump of cells and not even a formed baby yet. With no fight left in my tired soul, I conceded…
After, the procedure I was never the same again. I was put on the Nuva Ring and must have not been using it properly because a month later I was pregnant again. I felt as if I went through all of that emotional turmoil just to get pregnant again… I felt stupid and like it was for nothing. I didn’t even tell my mom this time. I just went in all alone and had an abortion all by myself…
I felt numb. I didn’t even know who I was anymore. I was lost. I spiraled out of control. What followed was the characteristics of a person I didn’t knew existed within myself. When I smiled, it felt forced. When I laughed it was insincere. I had multiple angry, violent outbursts where I would destroy things in my apartment just because I couldn’t bear consequences of my actions. I couldn’t remember how to be that happy go lucky and free young woman I used to pride myself on being. I cried constantly. All I could think about was how I caused harm and death upon my children. MY children. Those I should have gladly given my life to protect. It went against nature itself. I had suicidal thoughts and couldn’t bear the weight of the pain. …I pray to the heavens and to my two babies for forgiveness on a regular basis… Not a minute goes by where they are not in my heart and on my mind. … the pain still hasn’t subsided. I have a multitude of mental issues like crippling anxiety and depression. I feel a heaviness in my heart that won’t go away.”
“I was 22 years old and had a young son, my oldest son was four years old. My husband said that my sons were too young, so that I had to have an abortion. I obeyed, without thinking twice, because I was so in love. I felt insecure and I didn’t want him to leave me.
We were married, nothing was missing, and it was a really silly decision. He asked me to do it and I just did it….
My husband did not come with me, I went alone with my friend, I took a taxi afterwards and returned to my house, while my husband was at a party. My brain made the decision to block all that memory.
When I met the Christian pro-life association, Aesvida, and I began to hear about the consequences of an abortion, I realised that I had become an angry woman. You are not aware of where it comes from, but then I understood it.
I did not care for my other children, I did not like to hold their hands, I never gave them a hug. Now they are older, and I want to hug them, but they are used to their mom not touching them.
When I realised it, when everything came back to my mind, I started to get involved with pro-life activities, because I knew what I had done.”
In a pro-choice book, a woman who traveled from Ireland to England to have an abortion says:
“I spent that night in the clinic being checked on by nurses and crying a lot. I no longer had to hold it together. I had got to the UK… The third night was spent in the B&B and I knew I had to get all of my crying over and done with before I got home. As I shared my bedroom with my three younger sisters.”
Janet Ni Shuilleabhain “My Story” Aideena Quilty, Sinead Kennedy and Catherine Conlon The Abortion Papers Ireland: Volume 2 (Togher, Cork: Attic Press, 2015) 28
Despite appearing in a pro-choice book, this woman’s abortion doesn’t sound very empowering.
Emily Turner wrote a book about her life, her abortion, and its aftermath. She wrote:
“After the abortion, I sank to the lowest of lows. The greatest depth and darkness that covers the bottom of sea. There I laid. I stopped responding to messages and phone calls. No motivation to continue on for a Masters degree. My stomach was empty without the ache for food. Nothing could fill it. The grief and ache were unbearable.… Abortion is so incredibly isolating…
I feared what others would think of me. I feared their words, their judgments and their stares. I feared my reputation and my future. I feared being the outcast. Then I grieved a life. And I grieved a death. I grieved until my soul could take no more.”
Emily Turner The “A” Words: My Gut Wrenching and Mildly Hilarious Story from Abuse and Abortion Into Understanding Freedom (undated) 117, 121, 123
“Nineteen years ago I walked into an abortion clinic, as I was about to go in for the procedure I started crying, the doctor said to me he’s not doing it. I should go home and think about it because I was crying too much. I remember him saying “I have a conscience and if I do this based on the state you’re in, I’ll never sleep again.” Eight months pregnant, I experienced one of the worst cases of domestic violence. I suffered a fractured rib, severe trauma to the head and eyes, and had blood clots in my head. She was born okay. … I’m so grateful that God saw it fit to save her life when her mom didn’t know better! This gem is so RARE. I couldn’t imagine life without her and I know her siblings and grandmother feel the same. This child is light in a pitch black room. Happy birthday Chanel. … Kid your mom loves you with EVERY fiber of her being…”
Taira Afaha-Akpan Destined to Live: A true life story (2017)
“I had an abortion at 21 years old, at 10 weeks, and I have regretted it ever since. I was upset before I went through with it, and I came away from the hospital safe but feeling upset and empty. I have experienced depression for years, in part because of this.”
“Endangered, a World in Peril” Human Life Alliance, 1614 93rd Ln. NE., Minneapolis, MN, 55449, p 3
“I bought into the lie that abortion would be the best, the easiest, and the quickest way out of a difficult situation. I bought into the lie that my baby was just a blob of cells, a mass of tissue, nothing that even remotely resembles a human being. When I awoke from the abortion procedure in the hospital I began crying. “I want my baby. Where is my baby?” When I was told to shut up because I was upsetting other people in the recovery room, I was so ashamed I remained silent for the next 19 years.”
“Endangered, a World in Peril” Human Life Alliance, 1614 93rd Ln. NE., Minneapolis, MN, 55449, page 3
‘Hi, my name is Renae and I had an abortion when I was 14. I was barely an adult and just didn’t comprehend what was happening. I was pushed (by my mother) into making an uninformed decision out of convenience rather than given counselling and support to wrap my head around the situation I was facing. I now find this lack of care and information very disturbing.
I had no knowledge of what to expect or what would happen at the clinic – I was shuffled in without as much as a word. Someone asked me to confirm my name and that was it.
I was given an inadequate amount of drugs by the anesthetist. I woke up in the middle of the surgery and heard a doctor saying ‘There it is – got it!’ I was absolutely traumatized and distraught as I left the clinic that fateful day….
As a result of this experience I have endured depression, drug addiction and a ‘ruined life’. It’s ironic to think that my mum told me I would ruin my life if I had the baby, but no one ever stopped to think that maybe not having the baby and having an abortion instead would do the exact same thing.”
MICHAELENE JENKINS of SAN DIEGO, CALIFORNIA wrote:
“The suction machine was turned on, causing tremendous pain. I was frightened, it hurt so much. I wanted to scream. I wanted it to stop. I suddenly knew there was a baby inside. They were killing my baby!”