Author: Tech

From a collection of first-hand testimonies from women. These were gathered from a survey done by Priests for Life. They can be found on the Priests for Life website.

I was unmarried at 19 years old. My mother and boyfriend knew that I wanted to have an abortion. I felt at the time it was the only answer.

I was in the hospital at 8:00 AM. I believe that I had a suction abortion.

I didn’t want to talk about it. My sister became pregnant and kept her baby. She didn’t know that I had an abortion.

I do talk about it now. And my family feels sad about it.

I went to a therapist for 3 years off and on. I finally joined a post abortion support group. It helped a lot. I’ve been dealing with it daily. I like myself again.

I felt so bad about my choice to abort. I didn’t know what it would [do] to my life. I was mentally a wreck. I can see hope of total healing for me. It will be a while before then.

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From a collection of first-hand testimonies from women. These were gathered from a survey done by Priests for Life. They can be found on the Priests for Life website.

My family Doctor had referred me to a Psychiatrist in 1963, and when I became pregnant in 1965, they said I couldn’t have the baby because of the stress involved and reminded me of the 4 kids I already had. I don’t remember ANY of that abortion. In 1967, another pregnancy and Drs. said the same thing, except for the Psychiatrist who said I could make it. The other one, and my family Dr., and Pastor, urged me to abort, but I fought them off until the 12th week. Finally I had [an] abortion.

I felt cheated and violated and angry and after recovery (I had a tubal ligation after that one), I went to my 2nd mental hospital, where after 30 days my husband was told I’d probably never come home again. I was out in 6 months.
I made up my mind to forgive myself and others, and over time I’ve learned to live with the fact that I took 2 human lives, but not a day has gone by that I haven’t thought about those 2 babies and wondered about them. I also dream about babies A LOT – and have since I had my abortions.

My Dr. told me those pregnancies consisted only of “blobs – not real babies.” Just a few years prior to that he told me my Father was dead because he had no brain waves – (no electrical activity showed up on the EEG after his stoke) – Those babies I aborted had brain waves according to the medical articles I’ve read, yet he said they weren’t alive.

It just doesn’t make sense.

I’ve often resented the lack of information given to me by my Doctor. It wasn’t anywhere near adequate. Had I gotten it I’d have never agreed to those abortions.

They showed me how dependant on other people’s opinions I was, and I realized how much of a people pleaser I’ve always been, and how I had put Doctors on a pedestal and thought of them as “Gods.” I’m a more aware person now and more assertive and “challenging” where Drs. are concerned.

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From a collection of first-hand testimonies from women. These were gathered from a survey done by Priests for Life. They can be found on the Priests for Life website.

I was 14 years old at the time I became pregnant. I had an abortion at the age of 15. I was 13 weeks pregnant. My boyfriend and his parents didn’t want me to have an abortion. My parents didn’t want me to have the baby because my baby was half White and half Mexican.

My abortion was the worst moment of my life. The nurse gave me pain medicine but it still felt as if my insides were being ripped out of me.

I now realize I killed my baby. I would do anything in this world to know what my baby looked like, to hold my baby. I now have an 11 month old baby at 19 years old. But, not one day goes by I don’t think about my first child.

Time is the only thing that has helped me deal with my abortion. I realize I’ll never get to hold or see my baby – never. My son does not take the place of my first baby. I remember the nights when I used to cry all night long.

My abortion has changed my life in every way. I was young, but I never said I wanted to have an abortion. I was against it all the way. I didn’t want to kill my baby. My parents made the appointment and said I had to have an abortion.

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From a collection of first-hand testimonies from women. These were gathered from a survey done by Priests for Life. They can be found on the Priests for Life website.

I have had three abortions. Once at 26, just married – husband involved. Once at 32 – long time boyfriend involved. Once at 33 – unrequited love involved.

The first was very painful. Something was placed in my womb overnight to make me dilate and made me deathly sick. The procedure itself was done with no painkillers . . . I hyperventilated and passed out . . . I was sick to death in the “recovery room,” and had major cramps for days. I was 13 weeks pregnant. No one told me I didn’t have to have an abortion. The other two were both done with anesthesia, but still horribly painful. I was just too doped up to express it. The counselors did not “counsel.”

I repressed the abortions for 10 years . . . never thought about them, even for several years after I was “saved.” Then suddenly I began having nightmares. I began trying to figure out “how old” my children would have been (I had two children by this time) and I sank into deep and horrible depression, constantly crying and always hurting inside . . . I would go to sleep at night crying, “My babies . . my babies . . .”

I did a lot of praying and Bible reading, especially the verses on forgiveness. I began going to the Post Abortion Information Services office here and was counseled and encouraged by some very loving, understanding women, and yes, it has helped. The depression is gone, and I know I am forgiven and have forgiven myself . . . however, there will always be pain there . . . always.

I am deeply, deeply aware of LIFE, all life. I am horrified that abortion is legal, anywhere . . . and I will always carry the dark cloud of pain that comes with knowing that what I have done can never be undone.

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From a collection of first-hand testimonies from women. These were gathered from a survey done by Priests for Life. They can be found on the Priests for Life website.

My friends talked me into getting sexual experience. I became pregnant. My mother is a[n] alcoholic and hates men. I couldn’t tell her about the baby. All my best friends said it wasn’t a baby, only a lump of cells and I should have a[n] abortion, and the Doctor said it was all I could do.

They strapped me to a table, to wait in a hall. There were about ten to fifteen of us waiting. I told them I changed my mind. The nurse said I’d see the Doctor soon and I could tell her in the next room. I told the Doctor, she gave me a shot and put me to sleep.

I woke up screaming. I want my Baby. I bled a lot. I was in a deep depression. I couldn’t look at a baby or work near the Baby dept. I was working at Robinsons. I blamed my friends for it. It was awful. I don’t see my friends.
I wanted a baby. I thought I’d never get pregnant. It took over a month. The first time it took one night. I became Catholic. My Priest has helped me a lot. My Son is a[n] altar boy and my little Son is almost 6 years old.

[My boyfriend] left me because I wouldn’t abort my 2 sons. He’s married someone. . . He has to pay me $600 a month child support. I wish I had my Baby, my first Baby. It would be 14 now.

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From a collection of first-hand testimonies from women. These were gathered from a survey done by Priests for Life. They can be found on the Priests for Life website.

I was just re-married and my husband was 40. He didn’t want any children by me – his kids were grown and he didn’t want to start over again raising children. He had mine (a boy of age 4) to deal with and that was enough!

I had to have the abortion 2 times. I went early in my pregnancy to get it over quick (I’m a nurse and didn’t want the baby to be too big). The doctor didn’t get all of the parts, and in one month when I should have had my period I didn’t. A blood test showed I was pregnant. I was now 12 – 14 weeks along and had to have diliteria and re-aborted. Perhaps I had had twins? One aborted the first time and another continued to grow and aborted the second time. WHAT A HORRIBLE THOUGHT!

My son is 14 now. When I see him around smaller children I realize that I killed his brother or sister. He is an only child and will be that only because of my selfishness. This is an unchangeable – unforgettable thing to do to a child. I have remorse for killing my child who I did not know, but my real day-to-day sorrow is for my living child who will be alone in this world because of me.

I pray for God’s forgiveness and for God to care for my child who is now alone in this world because of me.
I would have never had an illegal abortion. It just would not have been the easy solution to an untimely pregnancy, and we all would have survived raising another child. Now I praise God for his forgiveness of my sin but my living son still is alone. When I’m old and need help, my selfishness may be repaid by loneliness. I praise God in all situations.

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From a collection of first-hand testimonies from women. These were gathered from a survey done by Priests for Life. They can be found on the Priests for Life website.

A neighbor told me about getting an abortion while I was on welfare. Welfare paid for it. My husband was aware of the decision. We had five children and I didn’t think we could support another one.

I went to a hospital in Beverly Hills. I was asleep at the time of the procedure. The attendant that wheeled me into the surgical room called it the dis-assembly line – I’ll never forget that. I asked the man I saw before the abortion if it was really alive at the time about 2 1/2 months. He said that was something he didn’t go into.

No one will ever know but me and my x-husband. The shame I carry will always be with me. I have five children. I chose to kill one of their brothers and sisters – I am shaking now as I write this – my tears will never undo what I did.

I became a Catholic and work with Pro Life groups. I know I am forgiven – but I will never forgive myself. I think if I heard the message given out now by Pro Lifers I wouldn’t have had the abortion – a picketer would have stopped me.
I live every day with the knowledge that I took an innocent life. I always shove it away. I would go crazy if I let myself think – This is the first time I have thought this long about it. My torment is good. I deserve it. I wish I had pain during the abortion. I got off too easy.

 

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From a collection of first-hand testimonies from women. These were gathered from a survey done by Priests for Life. They can be found on the Priests for Life website.

I was using a diaphragm (obviously wrong) got pregnant went to he doctor and was told I was the nurse made the appointment right then for me to abort 2 days following.

She asked me ” Do you want to have an abortion?” At the time I was so panic stricken I replied immediately, “Yes.” The days following were a nightmare my boyfriend literally hid and gave me no support whatsoever.

It was scary degrading and cold. I was so drugged up I walked out immediately after without signing out. I wanted to just get away from the place. I went a little crazy on the way home because they gave me pills to take for a week to stop the bleeding. I freaked at the thought of having to take something in my house that would remind me of what I did. After I slept 3 hours at home I felt a little better. I could think more rationally.

The day after my abortion was probably the last time I talked about it for 11 years. I stayed with the man who got me pregnant for 16 years following the abortion. We never discussed it. Not because I didnt want to He couldnt deal with it. I cried a lot for no reason, went though a lot of depression periods. I thought at the time I was losing my mind. I would go a few months fine.and then have major bouts of depression. I was on an emotional roller coaster like that for 11 years, always contemplating seeing a therapist of some kind. Since the abortion my eating habits are horrible. I think Im fat and have to lose weight all the time. Im 5 4 at 112 lbs. Im getting better with that though.

I found Jesus Christ 11 years later. I began to deal with what I did. Im still trying. Having the Lord has been the best medicine any doctor could prescribe. Im still having a very difficult time forgiving myself for killing my baby. Its something I have to deal with everyday but everything is possible with God!

I feel at this point there is a reason for everything.right now Im very much involved in the pro-life movement and the post abortion aspect of aborted woman. Ill soon be starting a post abortion support group within our church. Its so needed. There are so many hurting women out there.

Note: religious beliefs expressed in testimonies are not necessarily endorsed by website owner

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From a collection of first-hand testimonies from women. These were gathered from a survey done by Priests for Life. They can be found on the Priests for Life website.

1. How did you come to have the abortion(s) and who was involved?

Was raped in early 80 when rape laws were much different (man ended up on AMERICA’S MOST WANTED years later). Unable to prosecute at time – knew the person from place where I worked. Attorney advised it would be his word against mine. Did not know was pregnant until 3 1/2 months. Had 5 additional abortions. Bad judgement, fear, fallen away from faith, desire to know if I could still feel.

2. How would you describe your abortion(s)

Beyond heinous. Told it was nothing more than blob of jello: not a person yet, told that if I weren’t able to care for it, what would happen? Adoption not brought up as option, I believe, except only in brief mention after scare tactics instilled. First abortion was told as coming out of anesthesia that THEY DIDN’T GET IT ALL. Other abortions had massive passing of additional tissue – not clean jobs.

3. How did your abortion(s) affect you and others?

Still not capable to trust, relate to men with healthy relationships. Afraid to enjoy sex; afraid to get intimate …like friendships, but do not like to get too close where one “crosses the border” of friendship. Affected family (only told about rape); think of unborn children’s souls a lot and get blue at certain times of year – have tried to heal, read TILLY which helped a lot, gave them names. Shame still haunts me.

4. Please describe what you have done to deal with your abortion(s), and did it help.

As stated above, read TILLY, given them names, talk to them, pray for them, ask their forgiveness, confessed in church and to GOD my sin. Talked to friends who are in counseling services for advice; try to talk others out of it when can and to make aware of what PLANNED PARENTHOOD does not tell you; took a stand and wrote the President (got a reply). Wrote story about it – for myself.

5. How do you think your abortion(s) changed your life?

Will always be with me. I think that if I could kill my children…what am I not capable of…. self esteem is not good. Try to go on; the men involved when I tried to discuss with them 1) don’t want to discuss it and if I am to be their friend, should not bring up past 2) given ultimatum: baby or lose job, place to live and me (the man): 3) birth control convenience 4) other didn’t know.

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From a collection of first-hand testimonies from women. These were gathered from a survey done by Priests for Life. They can be found on the Priests for Life website.

I was backward and immature, wanting a baby, became with child and I was unwed. Then tragedy struck the home, doctor felt abortion was the only solution. I could not cause more pain. I had the abortion.

I was uninformed. Not counseled about other alternatives, like home for unwed mothers, adoption, etc. Only, “Are you sure”? I felt hard inside. I was “put out” for the abortion, but awake knowing I was a murderer.

For me, (there followed) 20 years of post abortion syndrome. Its my fault, I pushed it dead inside. Burying it there with all my painful memories, hurt and suffering.

Prayer and Bible reading helped me. Christian music and talking about it was a great help. Going to college (not as good). Going to work compounded my problems and caused some problems in marriage and home.

I had 20 years of intermittent hell on earth. Intermittent because of my God, and husband helped love. The hell on earth came from denial and lack of memory and forgiveness to self and others. I will forever be against abortion and feel woman should have the right to full knowledge about fetal development, abortion procedures and post abortion syndrome.

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