One woman told her abortion story:
“For me abortion has caused me much despair. It has been a month and I am more devastated now than ever. I feel guilt, and anger, and apathy towards almost all aspects of my life. I am lucky to have a boyfriend who will hear me out and be my sounding board. I have no one else to talk to. He lets me say that I am angry at him for not having to have the abortion, for only having to sit in the waiting room while I had this baby ripped from my body, that I am scared that our relationship might not last because we made this decision together.
Last week I went for my follow-up appointment. I had sent in a comment card stating that I wish a note had been provided to me regarding the delay in my abortion (I was in the operation room for 2 hours due to the stubborn cervix) and the outcome. I also stated that in lieu of a note it would have been courteous to inform my boyfriend what was going on since he was the last one in the waiting room and so much time had gone by. The nurse was curt with me and pretty rude about my negative comments. The same nurse then pulled out an ultrasound to show me my atypical cervix. That ultrasound showed my 9 week fetus, complete with arms and legs, prior to the abortion. I am now unable to go more than three or four hours without having the image of that unknowing baby nestled within my uterus. That image will haunt me for a while.
I was nervous about the abortion. I assumed I would be a little sad and that there would be pain. But the physical pain was a non-issue. The pain that I feel now is emotional and seems to have no end. I am doubting so much about my life now. I doubt my relationship (but luckily have a wonderful boyfriend who understands and lets me voice those doubts without feeling threatened), I doubt my family who merely expressed displeasure over my being an un-wed mother (it would destroy them if they knew what I had done), I doubt my career, and I doubt myself. My world has turned upside down.
I wish more than anything that we had chosen to keep our child….
I was pro-choice my entire adult life. Technically, I still am. But I am angry that this decision was so easy for me to make. I am angry that my abortion clinic gave me a comment card similar to one you get at the Marriott and then was rude to me because I didn’t have glowing things to say about my experience. I am angry at myself for having been so weak.”
Feminist Women’s Health Services Personal Stories
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Having an abortion when I was 17 was not my choice but that f my parents. I have lived with that day for46 years now. Every day is the same as the one before. I can’t stop thinking of the life I let be destroyed by my parents. I am just as guilty as they were because I let them tell me it was the only way. The year was 1971 and a day does not go by that I am not sorry. I did continue somehow and had other children but I cannot wait to get to heaven and tell my oldest how very sorry I am still.