14 years later, woman regrets her abortion

A woman on Pro-Woman Pro-Life gives her abortion testimony:

Regretting the abortion didn’t happen right away. I spent over fourteen years thinking nothing of it really.

There comes a point when you cease to see it as “I was never supposed to get pregnant in the first place” to knowing “I was never supposed to abandon that life. And the life I’ve had in the 14 years since the abortion has been an extreme of imbalance for not having that child that was supposed to have been a part of it, supposed to have given me gifts of grace and taught me profound, sometimes painful sometimes joyful lessons.

I’ve struggled to get those teachings elsewhere – teachings that would have come so naturally from raising a child. I’ve spent countless amounts of money on schools and therapies and metaphysical seminars. The underlying ingredient, as we all know, for health and healing is Love. The abortion was around $360. $360 to cut of a life long supply to the most necessary ingredient for healing. Then another $40…50…80,000 spent trying to buy that ingredient back in another form – a form that didn’t require me to be a parent, that let me remain the child.

Not to mention the countless thousands spent in the downward spiral of drug abuse that ensued in the years following the abortion. Never before tonight had I ever connected those two things in my life. Would I have started shooting herion if I’d never had an abortion? Obviously if I was raising a child I’d be less likely to experiment with fringe lifestyles but was the drug abuse a reaction to the abortion? If I’d lost the child through miscarriage or not gotten pregnant at all, would I have avoided a life of drug abuse? Most certainly if I had brought this being into the world in 1997 I would not have resorted to IV drug use by 1999.

I thought I would never have it together enough to raise a kid, would not have anything to offer. I didn’t even consider what that child had to offer me. That is not to condone the introduction of selfishness into the decision to have a child. Those who treat children as tools for their own gain do much harm to life as well. But the act of selfishness I participated it by aborting a life rather than aborting a lifestyle. That can never be undone. I pray with all my heart that every young woman considering an abortion will instead make the choice for the gift of life. It is not up to us to judge the quality of life and thereby determine its right to exist or not. If my daughter or son were alive today he/she would be 14 years old and would most likely have had a challenging quality of life. But he/she would have gotten the opportunity to make of it what he/she chose to. And the opportunity to transform the heart of one woman on earth -mine. That is a miracle I deprived myself and my child from partaking in.
Kristin S.

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Sibling mourns the death of her little brother, an abortion victim

“When I was 18 my mother told me about her abortion… I was aghast, and said something cruel to her like, “how could you do something so terrible?” We let it drop and I forgot about it. But I had not really forgotten. I didn’t think about it consciously for years… Suddenly I found myself thinking about my little brother! I became disoriented and lost control of the car for a moment as I burst into tears having lost him. I was astounded by my reaction, but I couldn’t shake the sadness and longing to have known him.”

Torre-Bueno A. Peace after Abortion (San Diego, California: Pimpernel Press, 1997) 70 – 71 from

Elizabeth Ring-Cassidy and Ian Gentles. Women’s Health after Abortion: The Medical and Psychological Evidence Second Edition (Toronto, Canada: The deVeber Institute for Bioethics and Social Research, 2003)

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Dr. Vincent Rue on the consequences of girls hiding abortions from parents

“When an adolescent elects abortion without parental consultation, she must inevitably return to her family context. However, she returns with a secret that shames and emotionally strains her coping abilities. She must employ increased deception to protect her secret and to protect herself from her perceived fears of being found out and condemned by her parents and siblings.”

Rue V. Postabortion Trauma (Lewisville, Texas: Life Dynamics, 1994; 28

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Children don’t understand the difference between “fetus” and “baby” says researcher

Giving the reason why the surviving siblings of an aborted baby may feel grief and guilt, particularly when the abortion is done after the third or fourth month:

“In the presence of prenatal life, young children do not separate the concept of “fetus” from the concept of “baby”. The conceptual difference between the two is a medical and social construct of adults and is not easily understood by children whose approach to the world is concrete.”

Furlong R M, Black R B. Pregnancy Termination for Genetic Indications: the Impact on Families. Social Work in Healthcare 1984, Fall; 10 (1): 17 – 34

Elizabeth Ring-Cassidy and Ian Gentles. Women’s Health after Abortion: The Medical and Psychological Evidence Second Ed (Toronto, Canada: The deVeber Institute for Bioethics and Social Research, 2003)  164

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We tell the parents we take the fetus apart, says abortionist

Dr. Cassing Hammond, abortionist, on what he tells women  who come in for a second trimester D&E abortion:

“But does that mean that we don’t share with them, that this involves dismemberment or separation of parts of the fetus or taking the fetus apart? We do. And we use that term. We say we take the fetus apart. We say, it is coming out in pieces and we make sure that that’s clear with the patients. And they understand it.”

Dr. Cassing Hammond, abortionist, in sworn testimony in National Abortion Federation, et. al. v. Ashcroft, U.S. District Court, Southern District of New York, April 1, 2004

Diagram of the type of abortion he is referring to

Diagram of the type of abortion he is referring to

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I’m at peace with my abortion, though I know I killed a baby

“I cannot tell you how beautifully you explain my feelings on this matter. I had an abortion in March, at the age of 32. I’m perfectly at peace with what I did, that it wasn’t the right time for us BUT I am also aware that it was a baby. It was completely a matter of competing needs- and the ones of my life, and my relationship, won out.”

Pro-choice website “Greta” June 28, 2005

Baby in the womb at eight weeks. Most abortions happen around this time

Baby in the womb at eight weeks. Most abortions happen around this time

Remains of baby aborted at 8 weeks

Remains of baby aborted at 8 weeks

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Pro-choice doctor explains why she doesn’t do abortions

Pro-choice author Lori Freedman quotes Dr. Vivian Costa who, despite being pro-choice, decided not to do abortions in her practice. She explains why:

“It is an end of life, and while I feel the patient should have an option, I didn’t feel comfortable being a provider.”

Lori Freedman Willing and Unable: Doctors’ Constraints in Abortion Care (Nashville, Tennessee: Vanderbilt University Press, 2010)  40

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Abortion doctor responsible for hundreds of thousands of abortions

Feet of unborn baby at seven weeks

Feet of unborn baby at seven weeks

From the partial birth abortion ban trials, an abortionist is asked how many abortions he has done.

Q. How many abortions of first and second trimester have you done during the course of your career, if you can just estimate that?

A. I’m sure you’re talking about hundred thousands.

Dr. William Fitzhugh, abortionist, in sworn testimony in Carhart vs. Ashcroft, Lincoln, NE, March 30, 2004

It is unthinkable to imagine one person responsible for so many deaths.  And heartbreaking to realize if he ever regrets his “life’s work” and turns away from abortion, how much guilt he would feel.  if he is ever capable of it.

Left over from an abortion at seven weeks, most abortions are done at this time or later

Left over from an abortion at seven weeks, most abortions are done at this time or later


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Pro-lifers pull aborted babies from dumpster

From Carole Novielli, Saynsmthn’s blog

We knew the abortion clinics could be throwing the aborted babies in the trash. So, how would we know which clinics were disposing the babies illegally? There was no way to know- we’d have to go to various ones and pull the trash to see.

That was a daunting task. But finally, our work paid off.

It was a Saturday afternoon when we approached a clinic located in a strip mall. The abortionist shared the dumpster with other business owners and we received permission to remove some discarded wood from the trash. Our real goal though, was the clinic’s trash- BINGO!

We grabbed several bags over a period of time, until, one day, we discovered that inside the bags were the containers that held babies aborted by suction abortion.

first hand 1

Then came the task of opening up each and every gauze sac. I stilled myself to open each one , knowing what I might see – not knowing how I’d react to it.

first hand 2Several did indeed look like ground meat.

To see their fragile little bodies so ground up that no distinguishable pieces remained was not entirely a surprise – after all – these were early abortions and babies that had been violently sucked out through a tube and into these jars.

[webmaster note; At six weeks and before the baby’s body is so small and delicate that it is ripped completely apart in an abortion, leaving no recognizable remains. The baby at this stage looks like this:


Yet when hit with the powerful suction machine, it is torn apart and nothing recognizable is left.]

Then…after carefully slicing one gauze sac, there it was. The fully formed arm of an aborted child.

first hand 4

Then a leg, another leg, ribs, skull, etc

first ahnd 5

first hand 6


As we rummaged through the bags we could see the medical records of the women whose children lay torn in pieces.

The cold-hearted abortionist had discarded the bodies of these dead babies in the trash along with their mother’s medical records with no care or concern for either.

At the bottom of the bag, we found a large foot which a pathologist later confirmed was from an unborn baby approximately 5 months gestation. The remaining body parts of that child were not in the bags we had.

first hand 10

As we meticulously went through the bags from that abortion clinic, I found myself feeling detached- I was looking squarely at the tiny remains of babies who suffered a horrific death and yet I had little emotion. After all, I had to finish the job I set out to do, I had to continue looking through the bags and opening each and every sac. Was I heartless? Uncaring? Unfeeling? Or was I being scientific and doing a job that had to be done?

I wrestled with this for a few days. And then….

The day arrived for the funeral for these little babies. We told no one who found them. In reality, those who attended did not care about the details – they cared only about giving these precious unborn children a decent burial. They wanted them remembered – their lives must count !

I attended the funeral like a pro, covering it for a pro-life magazine I wrote for at the time. As a journalist, I stood on stage watching people tearfully come forward and lay a rose – the symbol of life- on the small casket we purchased to place the tiny pieces of their broken bodies in.

first hand 11

One moment I was snapping pictures and the next….the next moment I was sobbing uncontrollably in the arms of an usher who was standing beside me on the stage. He must have seen a look in my eyes because his large torso was a comfort as I completely lost it and wept like a mother who just received the news that her beloved child was dead.

The tears and groans continued for a while and took me by surprise. After all, I was a professional, I was detached, I was looking at this from a journalists point of view – I was HUMAN!

As I write this today, I feel a lump in my throat as the memory of what I saw wells up inside me. I often think about the idea that abortion does not affect those who participate in it – the mothers, doctors, nurses, and clinic staff and I have to conclude that it absolutely does affect them.

As a young girl, I used to watch documentaries about the Nazi Holocaust and the Jews they slaughtered mercilessly.

Most people watched those films with great interest in the stories and facts they document.

But, for me, when I watched them, I recalled asking in the midst of my outrage, “ Who took those pictures?”

I remember thinking that had those pictures never been taken, society would not be sitting here today in absolute horror of what took place.

I knew at that moment that I wanted to document the abortion holocaust, and by the guidance of God, in some small way, I have.

first hand 12

Source: Carole Novielli  The day I saw abortion first hand Saynsumthn’s Blog

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At the funeral of a woman who died from legal abortion

From Saynsumthn’s blog, by Carole Novielli

I have witnessed many things over the past thirty three years in this fight for the sanctity of human life in numerous states where I stood against child killing. Protests, police abuse, men dragging women into the abortion clinic, and even the funeral of a woman killed from legal abortion.

Her name was Carolina Gutierrez and she received such a serious infection by the legal abortion facility she visited that they had to amputate parts of her body to try and save her life. But, the infection won and Carolina and her unborn child became a statistic in the abortion battle.

I took these pictures with the permission of her family, while attending her funeral:


Guet 2

guet 4

The funeral was very emotional. Her story had been in the news for days and knowing the truth about the condition of the abortion clinics in my county caused me to be angry, especially, in light of the continued silence by abortion advocates when women die.

Source: The day I saw abortion first hand Saynsumthn’s Blog

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